Unfortunately I was reading through Terrorizer the other day, as I skipped through the pages to the gigs at the back I saw some of the ads for new releases by various record labels and came to the conclusion that they are all written by one very stupid and oblivious person. Observe:

In Flames - Soundtrack to Your Escape: (Courtesy of Nuclear Blast)

"The Swedish Gods (!?!?!) with their long awaited masterpiece - Always a step ahead!

(And thats why every metal journalist with the exception of some fool from metal hammer have commented on how In Flames are idiots for trying to cater to a dying trend)

Dismember - Where Ironcrosses Grow (Courtesy of Karmageddon Media)

"The Swedish Death Metal Legend Returns... Long live Stockholm döds metal!"

(It seems that every swedish band are now LEGENDS or GODS. Anyone know what döds metal is by any chance?)

Occult - Elegy for the Weak (Also Courtesy of Karmageddon Media)

"Raging Thrash like Slayer worshipping the devil again, killer sound delivered by Andy Classen" (Who he?)

Fintroll: Trollhammaren EP (Courtesy of Spinefarm)

"The trollhammer swings again! The ep includes FOUR new non-album tracks + a track from the Nattfödd-album! Let the trolls forge your soul into something more...shaggy?"

(This is the most blatant cashgrab besides the In Flames Trigger EP Ive ever seen in my life. SHAGGY?!)

Conclusion: Metal Capitalism has become really sickening. The fact that idiot suits who know nothing about metal are employed to write descriptions of albums like these with primary school english is a fucking sin. nuff said.[/i]

I agree I mean the In Flames quote really should be

"The Swedish Gods (!?!?!) with their long awaited masterpiece - Always one step behind linkin park!"

Shit, now I know you're 17 and Toozey's 15 I'm definitely NOT gonna reveal my age! I'm not gonna leave myself open to OAP jokes LOL!